Absolutely Scabulous!
sPRING 2024
The onset of March fills me with hope as winter gives way to intermittent bouts of sunshine and warm weather , causing trees to bud, and flowers to bloom! Glorious spring is said to lurk just around the corner— and yet, the ongoing rain tells a different story: We may be done with winter, but winter, it seems, is not quite yet done with us, Rain extinguishes sun, clouds impede light. Hope may spring eternal, but still, it’s tinged with melancholy.
And as I wait (impatiently!) for winter to be gone, I take refuge in my new favorite book, The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, a fanciful glossary of make-believe words by John Koenig , describing a range of fleeting emotions for which the English language has no words. In particular, I find myself coming back to one word: “scabulous”—a hybrid word comprised of the words “scab” and “fabulous,” cobbled together. Koenig defines his imaginary adjective like so:
scabulous
adj. proud of a scar on your body, which is an autograph signed to you by a world grateful for your continued willingness to play with her, even when you don’t feel like it.
I know that my students understand the meaning of “scabulous” all too well. How could they not? Everyone who’s ever tackled the arduous process of college applications—heck, anyone who’s ever fought for a dream of any sort—can proudly claim to be ‘scabulous,” having incurred more scars in the struggle than they can count. In the case of my students, unlike soldiers or Marines, their “scabulous” battle-scars go unseen.
But make no mistake, whether your hard-earned battle scars are visible or not, you can proudly claim to be “scabulous” if you’ve ever endured any of the following scenarios:
You can proudly claim to be “scabulous” if … you’ve ever waded through piles of mind-numbing worksheets, outdated slides, and schoolwork amounting to no more than busywork, draining you of your passion for meaningful learning.
You can proudly claim to be “scabulous” if … you’ve ever gotten stuck with doing all the work on a group project, then shared the “A” with peers who didn’t lift a finger to help.
You can proudly claim to be “scabulous” if … you’ve ever lost sleep over your social life—if, for example, you’ve ever worried about being invited to “The Party of the Year,” or fearful your popularity might tank without any warning.
You can proudly claim to be “scabulous” if … you’ve ever withstood peer pressure to participate in self-destructive, reckless activities like drinking, vaping, or hosting an unsupervised party.
You can proudly claim to be “scabulous” if … you’ve ever spent summer months studying for the PSAT, only to miss the cut-off score for the National Merit Scholarship competition. (Or if you’ve ever persisted through countless hours of SAT or ACT prep, especially those darn full-length practice tests!)
You can proudly claim to be “scabulous” if … you’ve ever borne witness to the ravages of stress etched into the faces of juniors as they discuss colleges, thereby transferring their own terror directly into your nervous system, as if via osmosis!
You can proudly claim to be “scabulous” if … you’ve spent the bulk of your young years listening to the outspoken exhortations of well-meaning parents who want you to attend the highly selective college of their dreams!
Last but not least, you can definitely claim to be “scabulous” if… you’ve ever suffered stoically as a certain College Admissions Coach (who shall remain nameless!) pesters you with frantic reminders to finish that independent project already! (Sorry, not sorry, gang!)
Fortunately, most of these annoyances will soon scab over and fall away, leaving your precious, courageous heart intact, and your spirit strong, and more resilient than ever! In the meantime, be sure to nurture your fabulous, “scabulous” self by practicing excellent self-care in the following ways:
• Eat regularly and consume healthy foods at least 80% of the time.
• Care for your gorgeous growing brain with 8 hours of sleep each night.
• Watch your time: Don’t say “yes” to too many projects or put off taking care of what must get done.
• Set boundaries on your social media and video game time.
• Get plenty of fresh air by doing outdoor activities.
• Cultivate 1-2 friendships with people you trust to have your back.
• Inch outside your comfort zone, making sure not to jeopardize your physical or mental health.
And for my seniors? Don’t lose sight of the fact you have a whole world of possibilities ahead of you. Being denied or waitlisted by your dream or target schools is, in the big picture, tantamount to nothing more than a pesky scratch; it will heal quickly. Yes, go ahead and process any feelings of disappointment, but rest assured: You possess the gift of years to build a happy, meaningful life.
So, please, never doubt you’ll make your mark on the world, scars and all.
Soon, the rain will stop. Spring looms bright on the horizon.
In closing, I’ll leave you with the words of John Koenig from The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows: Whatever happens, always remember that “the world is grateful for your continued willingness to play with her, even when you don’t feel like it.”
Love always,
College Coach Karen
*If you’re having a tough time shaking off the blues, please don’t hesitate to reach out to someone who can help—parents, guardians, mentors, teachers or school counselors. Or call or text 988 to reach the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Or use the Lifeline Chat. Services are free and confidential.